When I think about my experience with my menstruation and my blood during the first decades (!) of my life, I get angry and need to go and do some emotional release immediately! I´m angry at my mom, at the school system, at my gynecologist, at society, at the commercials and so on. I´m angry about the stories I´ve been told and I´m sad that I experienced the miracle and beautiful gift of menstruating in such a negative way for most of my life.
And I´m super grateful for shifting my belief system during the last couple of years and finally being able to honor my blood and my cycles more and more.
Here are some of the false stories i believed for too long:
1. It´s normal to be in pain and to feel sick when I´m bleeding. That´s the burden I have to carry as a woman. Like the pain of giving birth. 2. Nobody should know the difference if I am bleeding or not- especially not in the job world. I should be in the same perfect energy all the time! Best to take pain killers and use tampons for nobody to realize when I am on my moon. 3. Blood is disgusting and dirty, no one wants to see it, know about it, get in touch with it. I should get rid of it as unobtrusively as possible! (the worst nightmare of embarrassment would be showing stains on white pants!!!) … I could go on with the list, but these are the main things. There wasn´t a doubt for me that all these stories are true, because everyone was supporting these messages. My mom, who suffered during her moon all her life as well, just didn´t know better. And we all know the commercials about tampons and pads that show how much blood they can take with BLUE (!?) liquid. These commercials always tell the story of women who want to go on with life as “normal” when they are bleeding…. It seems like no one ever mentioned, what I know now:
1. FUCK NOOO! It´s not normal to be in pain when I am bleeding! If I am in pain, my body is alarmed, wants desperately my attention and needs me to know something: probably she needs me to rest. Making me feel sick is a strategy to get me there, eventually. Since I honor my cycle and it´s different energies, I don´t have cramps anymore!!! 2. BULLSHIT! A woman´s life is cyclic and not always the same. If someone doesn´t understand, I explain it like this: Try to pick flowers for a bouquet in the snow of winter. It´s essential to inform people around me when I´m bleeding! Like this we can all honor my need of more going inwards better. Like this I can also make the most of my “high energy time” around my ovulation. Why would I poison myself with medication and inserting toxic materials into my body to hide a process that is natural and sacred?
3. BLOOD IS SACRED! Especially the moon blood. It´s a very potent elixir, meant to nurture a baby to grow out of a sperm and an ovum. It´s so potent that flushing it down the toilet would be a real waste. There are so many things to do with the blood: - I give it back to nature (just to the earth or I nourish a tree or even a plant in my apartment with it- it makes plants grow like crazy!) - I create art with it - I use it for rituals (anointing/blessing myself or others, to connect with the feminine energies, offering to meaningful places or on meaningful dates
….the witchy possibilities are endless
The main thing I learned is, that my blood is sacred and potent and so is the time of menstruation in my life if I honor it.
It reminds me of what I am capable of in my life: each month my body shows me that I can give birth- to a child or to anything that wants to come alive through me.
It´s a time of going inwards, resting, higher sensitivity and letting go. It´s my little death to be reborn newly each month.
It is my connection to the cycle of the moon, of the year and of life. I consider this as one of the biggest gifts in my life!
And I´m very glad I got to unwrap and feel the beauty of it before my cycle of life will turn into winter. At some point, I will stop bleeding each month, but I will keep what my blood taught me: the connection to my cyclic being, the moon, the seasons and the mystery of life itself.